8 signs youre dating a narcissist

8 signs youre dating a narcissist8 signs youre dating a narcissistConfidence is key to any strong relationship, but theres a significant difference between your partener posting the occasional selfie with the caption FeelingMyself and dating a full-blown narcissist.According to Dr. Craig Malkin, a clinical psychologist and Harvard Medical School professor, narcissism is a personality trait found in all humans to some extent and is derived from the drive to feel special, exceptional or unique. However, narcissism exists on a spectrum, Malkin said, and individuals with severe cases that compromise interpersonal relationships likely have narcissistic personality disorder.Follow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazines on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and moreNarcissistic Personality Disorder definedTheMayo Clinic definesnarcissistic personality disorder as a mental condition in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others. Narcissism can manifest in a variety of ways, many of which can be detrimental to both your significant other - and yourself - and is often used toveil insecurity and poor self-esteem.While narcissistic behavior can be a cry for help, it can also be incredibly damaging to both your relationship and your own well-being. Before you seek out ways to help your partner or decide to call it quits on your romance, its helpful to know if they are actually exhibiting the signs of narcissistic personality disorder.Signs of Narcissistic Personality DisorderHere are signs your partner may be struggling with narcissistic personality disorder1. They dominate conversationsRelationships are a two-way street, but a narcissistic partner will find any possible way to redirect a conversation back to themselves. Rather than listening attentively, theyre prone to cut you off to share their own perspectives or change the subject altogether in order to shift the focus back on them.2. They are obsessed with appearancesNarcissists are focused on appearances in all sense of the word, from physical looks to perceived success. Is your partner constantly staring at themselves in the mirror or distracted by their reflection while strolling past store windows? Are theyobsessively focused on obtaining flashy work titlesand expensive sports cars regardless of if they reallywantthem? You may have a narcissist on your hands.3. They cant take criticismConstructive criticism is a healthy part of personal growth, be it through a performance review or an honest discussion about your relationship. Individuals with narcissistic personality disorder will bristle in the face of criticism, either rejecting and ignoring it altogether, or becoming outwardly angry and hostile. Their elevated sense of self makes it difficult for them to absorb suggestions for improvement, and thus theyre significa ntly less receptive to critical feedback.4. They are empathy impairedMalkin says the key to spotting narcissistic personality disorder is observing the three Es - exploitation, entitlement, and empathy impairment. However, this is different than lacking empathy altogether. Dr. Malkin noted that instead the level of empathy may fluctuate over time, which can be especially challenging in relationships.Itll appear that theyre not motivated, or that they are too preoccupied with their own needs to anzeige empathy, says Malkin. But they have a capacity for empathy and this can make it very confusing if youre in a relationship with them.5. Theyre controllingNarcissists want and demand to be in control, and their sense of entitlement makes it seem logical to them that they should be in control - of everything, wrote Dr. Margalis Fjelstad in anarticle for Mind Body Green. Theymay monitor where youre going, who youre talking to, what youre wearing, etc. Everything you do fits into their pe rsonal narrative to achieve a perceived sense of perfection.6. They act entitled and constantly seek validationA person with narcissistic personality disorder believes they are owed and deserving of everything, regardless of whether theyve truly earned it. As a result, they will often go out of their way to seek praise, but will rarely reciprocate it.A narcissists need for validation is like a funnel, Fjelstad wrote. You pour in positive, supportive words, and they just flow out the other end and are gone. No matter how much you tell narcissists you love them, admire them, or approve of them, they never feel its enough - because deep down they dont believe anyone can love them.7. Theyre addicted to social mediaIn todays social media obsessed world,it can be hard to determine what constitutes a normal amount of, say, Instagram usage. However, a narcissist may post significantly more than the average user, while fixating on the number of likes, talking about it incessantly in convers ation as part of their need for validation.8. They exhibit signs of substance abuse or other mood disordersSome narcissists may self medicate with alcohol or drugsand show symptoms of addiction, which may tell a larger story of the demons theyre battling. Despite demonstrating outsized ego, a narcissistic partner will in some cases exhibit symptoms of other mood disorders, like depression and anxiety.How you can helpSo what do you do if you notice your partner is showing several of these signs? Encourage them to talk to a therapist, who can help them get to the root cause of the narcissistic behavior. A trained mental health professional can also identity ways to reduce narcissism and ultimately help the patient improve their interpersonal relationships.This article originally appeared on Talkspace.You might also enjoyNew neuroscience reveals 4 rituals that will make you happyStrangers know your social class in the first seven words you say, study finds10 lessons from Benjamin Frank lins daily schedule that will double your productivityThe worst mistakes you can make in an interview, according to 12 CEOs10 habits of mentally strong people